Life in the Kingdom of Nugent

Rocker Ted Nugent is notorious in the entertainment world for being an actual living, breathing, conservative Republican. Although, like Luther and Wonker, he defines the term in his own, quite precise way, and is happy to elaborate on the details, as related in a long interview piece written by an eyebrow-raising lefty journo in the UK's Independent:

I confess to a grudging respect for the system by which he governs his land, though I'm not sure I'd like to see his reign extended to the state of Michigan.

"What do these deer think when they see you coming?" I ask him. "Here comes the nice guy who puts out our dinner? Or, there's the man that shot my brother?"

"I don't think they're capable of either of those thoughts, you Limey asshole. They're only interested in three things: the best place to eat, having sex and how quickly they can run away. Much like the French."

"You wrote a song called 'Dog Eat Dog'. You see the world like that. But we're not dogs - that's the trouble."

"Remember the movie Old Yeller? Everybody loved him. He brought us our slippers. We gave him cookies. But when Old Yeller gets rabies, you shoot him in the fucking head. It's that simple."

"Just like Saddam Hussein used to be our friend, and the Taliban used to be freedom fighters?"

"Politics, man. I don't have to placate some Arab numb-nut because he holds all our fuel."

After a few more provocative questions, parried nicely by Nugent, Ted winds up with a highly-plausible foreign policy statement that also puts what's known as "liberalism" in its place:

"You want to know how to get peace, love and understanding?" he replies. "Who doesn't know this? The Ku-Klux-Klan? The Black Panthers? Child rapists? How do you get peace, love and understanding? First of all you have to find all the bad people. Then," Nugent adds, "you kill them."

In the end, that's what it will come down to, I think. Sometimes the simplest solution is the best one. Read the rest by accessing the link above. And a hat-tip to Little Green Footballs for tipping us off to this great piece.